Jerry was a race car driver He drove so goddamn fast He never did win no checkered flags But he never did come in last Jerry was a race car driver He'd say "El Sob number one" With a Bocephus sticker on his 442 He'd light 'em up just for fun Ahhhh Ahhhh Captain Pierce was a fireman Richmond engine number three I'll be a wealthy man when I get a dime For all the things that man taught to me Now, Captain Pierce was a strong man Strong as any man alive It stuck in his craw That they made him retire at the age of sixty-five Ahhhh Ahhhh Go! Hee hee hee! Dog will hunt! Ahhhh Ahhhh Jerry was a race car driver Twenty-two years old One too many cold beers one night Wrapped himself around a telephone pole, go!