Discipline in my habits Went distant on my attachments I had to turn my presence to absence Stuck in the cage Questioning the hours and days... Depression-al phase My tunnel vision starting to fade I started to marry my thoughts, already engaged Not knowing my next move had me going insane Depending on alcohol to get me over the pain Praying my habit don't ever have me turn to cocaine I won't allow this temporary pain to turn into a stain I wanna live but my joy for life is stuck in the grave God, I need you more than ever, I was hoping you came So used to holding shit in, it's kinda hard to explain Picasso, the best way to put it Before you knew the meaning of it, you misunderstood it Far from perfect, did a lot of shit I knew I shouldn't Ducking my demons but they coming like a moving bullet Shit is crazy out here It's like I love it and I hate it out here Gotta be mentally stable out here Just to make it out here Never slippin' Every day I'm aware If I ain't got it, I go get it And I make it appear Tough love being assertive That's the way that I care When I'm distant and I ignore you Then to me you ain't there When I erase you that's when you worry Replace yo ass in a hurry That's the truth not a dare, nigga Do not compare All this pain in me I want it washed away I gotta keep faith in me These niggas want me dead I gotta stay strong Stay strong I've been fighting all my life Whoa May God watch my soul Only people that think that I fell off Is the people that wasn't supportin, before the fame and the fortune My fanbase was already a force and I was selling out shows before the radio sources Meaning the grinding and the independence what got me in it Not a cosign or a mention and this is not fiction Now I'm feeling attention from muhfuckers that once was dick lickin' And pic flicking, friendshipping This isn't no damn fool, I know the game so it's cool And when you play the game, play by the rules Momma ain't raised no coon, I know the difference between loved and used Life is just hugs and bruises, care and crew Fuck desire, my heart pump fire, ooh Don't inhale my fumes, I'm toxic, caged in like zoos Boxed in like boxing, in the studio, locked in And you couldn't walk a block in my shoes Not even my socks, shit I came from the bottom, that's why I fuck with top shit I'm talking about the never, ever, ever in stock shit I don't pop shit, I speak knowledge so call me a prophet And if you pay attention then you paying homage Cheap jeans with paid pockets This pound cake got these weight watchers, weight watchin' I ain't stopping like Hov said Sit in front of the Bentley with the doors out like bow legs I hate a bitch with a fat ass and no legs I love a bitch with some crack pussy and dope head Broke bread with niggas, all I got was a thank you And you got some other niggas out here saying they made you The game trying to erase you Got my foot on they necks, you disrespect the TEC'll give you a facial Apologies to my ex's and no this ain't my confessions Appreciate your time and investment, patience and effort Having ya'll was part of a blessing Ya'll all belong on the cover of essence No hard feelings, no love lost, no bad blood Yeah, love is a bad drug but better to have love than no love I need a blunt, KorLeone can you roll one? And smoke one All this pain in me I want it washed away I gotta keep faith in me These niggas want me dead I gotta stay strong Stay strong I've been fighting all my life Whoa May God watch my soul